Here’s some random crap I found while browsing CNN.com, still my favorite news site for no other reasons than the clean layout and Ted Turner’s politics:

That’s one way to handle it.

History has taught us that it takes at least 10 goofy bastards to stage a successful coup.

Crazy white man at Roger Williams uses the N-word and explains thus: “I apologized for that. What else can I do? Kill myself?” Is that an offer? At least he’s being magnanimous about the whole thing…

All this world needs is more apologies. I hate unnecessary apologies. I make people apologize for them.

Speaking as a moral relativist, you’re boring the fuck out of me. Obama did coke and pot back in the day, and he acts like it wasn’t a big deal, because it wasn’t a big deal. That says more about his morals than any of Edwards’s bland bullshit.

Best places to live? Or do you mean best places to avoid being near poor people? The list should go like so: 1) New York City 2) Portland, Oregon 3) Other big cities 4) Medium cities 5) Crappy suburbs 6) Rural communities 7) Money’s list… inverted.

When all is said and done, this guy will end up with the best nickname ever. My first thought was Toothface, but that sounds too much like a Batman villain.

I smell the end of the GOP.

I always thought he choked on his own ego… or his own dick.

Faith restored.