It goes without saying that there are a lot of crappy people with crappy taste in movies in this country, but this gives me hope. It’s one of those movies you don’t need to see to know it’s total pap (People who tell you you need to see something before judging it tend to have bad taste).

From the glance I took at the synopsis, it’s about a guy who’s cursed for some reason and has problems with his love life or some shit. But then he meets a woman, who happens to look like Jessica Alba, and he falls for her. For some reason the curse says he can’t fuck her or she’ll run away or something. Whatever. Now I’m bored and sad.

Then again, I didn’t need to go even that far to judge it. Quality entertainment is the opposite of Dane Cook. He’s a perma-dumbass who’s not even fun to listen to when you’re drunk or high or stupid or all three. And Jessica Alba? Well, a part of her exquisite hotness is ruined every time she opens her mouth to talk.

I know I’m picking on easy targets, but they totally deserve it. As long as zero of my screenplays are in production, I reserve the right to complain about shitty movies to no end.